Outward Affections

I find it very ironic that I have never seen anyone kissing on Indian TV, but as a whole Indian culture is much more hands-on. Two men will regularly walk down the street with their arms around each other’s shoulders or holding hands. At first I was impressed; what an open-minded society! But then I realized that it is acceptable for men to touch each other because it is entirely unthinkable that the relationship could be other than platonic. Not so open-minded.

The other Fulbrighter in Hyderabad is having a tough time, because everyone wants to touch his not so touchable 3-year-old. Strangers see him on the street, and immediately run over to pinch his cheeks, rub his head, or even pick him up. I’ve watched as the poor boy runs away from these people screaming, making them want to pinch him even more—so they chase him! I can only imagine how people in the U.S. would react if total strangers started chasing and grabbing their children.

Here’s one physical caress that I discovered. The caresser cups the caressee’s face briefly before making a gentle swiping motion; then they bring their fingertips to their lips and kiss them, as an Italian would after appreciating a good meal. It is so sweet and unobtrusive—no pinching of cheeks like those pesky aunts or up close and personal kissing like those amative French. Just a simple little caress and then kiss to the air.